Hi, I'm new here and this is my first post. I'm in Year 7 and I have anxiety/OCD.
I guess my main problem in life right now is the fact that I feel like I don't belong in school and that I have very few friends. Of course, amongst the friends that I do have, they're all very supportive and kind. But honestly, life in primary school was so much easier/more exciting. I was School Captain in Grade 6, and the transition between last year and 2018 has been a difficult one. In Term 1, for example, I came in to the grade trying my hardest to be voted Class Captain. I was constantly trying to maintain an attitude that I knew everybody would appreciate, as well as helping others as much as I could.
So I was devastated when I wasn't voted as a candidate.
This kind of situation sounds so petty when I put it into words. But it hurt me a lot, and it's sucked up a lot of my motivation for 2019.
I've also been bullied twice this year - something that's never, ever occurred in all the years of my life. I'm seriously doubting the advantages of this school.
I want a fresh start, but I'm worried that everything's just going to repeat itself again next year (2019). I feel like, no matter how hard I try, all my efforts to be appreciated/noticed/liked are totally wasted. Not that I want to be 'popular' - I just want to be recognized as somebody more than an outsider.
The school is always advertising positive qualities and funds and charities and whatnot - something that my old school never really did - and yet I feel like I fitted in more in primary school than now. I'm honestly not sure what to do. I'd never even wanted to come to this particular school in the first place.
I know that I should be grateful that I have an education - the academic standards of this school are actually very high. I feel that my grades have improved quite a lot since last year.
But my mental state has not.