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Topic: New Here - Would love some advice

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. RoseyAlexa
    RoseyAlexa avatar
    1 posts
    19 March 2019

    Hi All... I'm Alex.

    So, I'm 14 and have a very privileged life. I go to a good school, have some friends, etc... But I often am really sad for a lot of reasons. My friends say they're going to be there for me but then when I go to my best friend for help and tell her my issues and why I'm upset she completely ignores me and doesn't respond - I felt really hurt because I'd been there for her for so long. She's also been spending a lot more time with new friends (people who used to bully her) than me and i guess it just kinda hurts. My community is very respectful of the LGBTQIA+ community but I think I like my friend *a lot* and i honestly don't know what to do about it because she has a crush on another girl at my school. Also my mum doesn't have a job and helps me a lot and I'm extremely grateful for her but she tries to control everything I do in regards to my schoolwork and it almost seems like she's trying to live through me. She's also verbally and sometimes a bit physically abusive (in my opinion) when we fight, and I know she loves me but I think shes menopausal and almost seems bipolar (athough I wouldn't know). She makes me not want to come home sometimes and I feel like a traitor writing this because she's been there for me etc but idk. I'm really sorry if this just comes off as the bratty whinings of a middle class highschooler - I realise people have A LOT more serious problems than mine but I thought I'd give sharing a go. I'd love any kind of advice/response! - Alex x

    1 person found this helpful
  2. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    307 posts
    19 March 2019 in reply to RoseyAlexa

    Hello Alex

    Welcome and thank-you for being a part of the forum family too!

    The Beyond Blue forums are a non judgemental and Safe place for you to post :-) You have taken the time and effort to write your own thread topic...That makes you an amazing and strong person Alex!

    You are not a traitor or have shown any disrespect towards your mum in any shape or form. You are an individual that wants to have a talk to others that may be in a similar situation as yourself.

    14 is a difficult age...seriously....You have academic goals.....doing your best to be a good son (which I am sure you are) Peer group pressure even though common can be a challenge as well....especially at 14!

    I am sorry that you are going through a difficult time at home as you mentioned with the verbal and sometimesphysical abuse Alex. Only if its okay...can I ask why your mum becomes frustrated with you? Please ignore my question if you wish as I am only trying to help out...No worries either way

    Your best friend doesnt really seem to be behaving like a best friend by ignoring and not responding to you. That would be hurtful at any age Alex...Has your friend given you a reason why at all?

    You have nothing to apologise for Alex. Beyond Blue dont prioritize peoples problems. Your situation is just as important to us as anyone else's here..even mine...also being a new member is important to us as if we didnt new people....the forums would cease to exist.

    Your privacy and well being are paramount to us Alex. When and if you wish....you are more than welcome to post back. There are many gentle people on the forums that can be here for you too :-)

    my kindest thoughts and best

    Paul

  3. Fluffal Cat
    Fluffal Cat avatar
    2 posts
    8 April 2019 in reply to RoseyAlexa

    Hi Alex.

    I don't want to sound arrogant, or conceited, but I can really relate to you.

    I guess my parents aren't as bad as some, however, they seem to control every opinion, and every choice I make. I find it difficult to try get them to relate with me, and to try get them to understand my own views and opinions. My friends also never seem to be there...

    But enough about me, this is about you!

    You don't need to feel sorry for anything, like Mr Paul (I'm sorry if your name is wrong, I don't mean to be rude) stated before, your situation is just as important as anyone else's. This forum was practically made for people like us(again, I don't want to sound vain or anything... I just don't know how to phrase things properly).

    Just know that there are people out there for you!

    With a huge, warm, hug,

    Fluffal Cat.