Online forum 

These forums are a place where you can ask other young people advice on dealing with tough times and share your advice on what has worked for you. Please remember that it does not replace professional advice.

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please join our online community.

You should also have a read of the community rules. Forum membership is open to anyone residing in Australia.

Join the online communityLogin to post


Topic: My life has been bad lately

20 posts, 0 answered
  1. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    19 November 2018
    I was just at school,I didn’t think that I was going to last the day
  2. geoff
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    847 posts
    20 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    Hello Ashely, I'm so sorry that no one has got back to you.

    Is it possible to ask you a question or two, I'll be gentle in what I say, and just answer when you want to.

    Have been able to talk to your school counsellor and would like to know if your parents know how you are feeling, I'm sorry.

    I only ask you because it would be best if someone knew how you felt and what was going on, maybe a friend or a family member who you can talk to.

    Again, please forgive me but it's very concerning what you told us.

    You thread will be pushed back to page 1 and then by the time you might have replied, someone else will on line.

    I really hope that we do hear back from you.

    Geoff,

  3. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    20 November 2018 in reply to geoff
    I do forgive you .There is a school chaplain at my school I do see her every week for the past year now but I don’t know if I’ll be able to tell her what I’ve been feeling .I wish I could someone other than my school chaplain
  4. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    20 November 2018 in reply to Ashely
    I feel alone because I don’t think that I’ll ever tell my best friends how I’ve been feeling lately.
  5. geoff
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    847 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    Hi Ashely, thank you for your generosity and excuse me, as I log off at about 2 pm and I start very early, you're my first reply this morning.

    I understand that talking to someone face to face could be rather difficult, simply because we always are a bit afraid of their reaction and what they may do in return, although a school chaplain's word is confidential.

    Again can I ask a question and yes I'll always be gentle in what I say, is the chaplain an elderly person, compared to your age, and perhaps would you feel more comfortable talking with a younger person who is trained to associate with younger people such as yourself?

    I realise that how we think can change from day to day and our mood can be affected by what goes on, and especially what may have been said to us.

    I'm pleased to be able to talk to you, and if for some reason I say something that upsets you please let me know because that's not what I want to do.

    Geoff.

  6. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to geoff
    My school chaplain in young
  7. geoff
    Life Member
    • Awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    847 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    Hello Ashely, are you able to drive, I was just wondering whether you could contact these 2 places I'll give you.

    These places have trained people who are dressed in casual clothes and don't seem so confronting and will go slowly at your own pace.

    These are places to contact either by phone or by email, and please I'm only mentioning these out of care but I want you to have a look at these places,

    -ReachOut

    -Headspace

    -Kids Helpline for people aged 5 up to 25 1800 55 1800

    -Lifeline 13 11 14

    -Suicide Callback Helpline 1300 659 467

    Can you please reply back to me, I would really like that.

    Take care.

    Geoff.

  8. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to geoff

    I’ve looked at these links.

  9. Terry73
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Terry73 avatar
    10 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    Hi Ashely,

    I dont wish to intrude too much, and Geoff is a brilliant guy for advice, so I wont say much other than what he has suggested except I was wondering, if you are ok to share with us, what is the actual issue that is making it hard for you in school? you mentioned about not being able to speak about it to your best friend, and I do know what thats like as well (if its the same issue I am thinking about that I had back in my school days), but understand that we are totally confidential and safe here as we do not know any of each others particulars and can give amateur advice based only on the issue and the information freely given.

    I hope we can help you get through this, or at very least point you in the right direction to seek out a the help you need to find a good solution.

    Terry

  10. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to Terry73

    The problem is I feel worried sick like something bad is going to happen and then at school people talk (even more if there’s a relief teacher.

    Of course I always try to be good so I feel it disappointed that no one sees me as a role model for the people who always act silly to see some of the rewards I get but some of the boys don’t see what I do to be good and they act silly and chatty.

    I know that school will be the exact same with the behaviour with the boys every single day.

    My teacher is good at managing with behaviour (at least that’s what I think) but it’s only when my teacher tells the class that they listen to be not be silly,chatty and then they have manners but sometimes they come back to school and act silly again.

    That makes me not want to go to school I’ve already told my teacher how I’ve been feeling but they haven’t spoke to me yet so I’m wondering when he will speak to me.

  11. Terry73
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Terry73 avatar
    10 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    You sound like you are well mature beyond your years, which is a good thing. Also you seem to have a lack of life experience as well, which again isnt a bad thing, but can make you unaware of the world as well.

    Its good you like to see yourself as a role model, and do your best to live up to that (dont ever lose that by the way, its a rare trait people should have), but also dont let your pride also allow your thoughts to think yourself better than others.

    Best way to teach others how to become better, is to not try and change people for the better, but to let them see how its done by being an example of it in your own life, it was someone like that who changed my ways for the better, and had a huge impact on my own life, that made me become a better person, not only in other peoples eyes, but my own as well.

    If the kids act silly, then dont pay them much attention, but dont forget to enjoy life on the way too, sometimes something silly is much needed in life as well, to spark that laugh, smile or even a happy thought.

    It does take a while to show some people what a good life is, but when they finally realize it, its worth it all in the end, other people catch on quickly, but if you still keep the good role model attitude without letting it take over and put your mind into an "elitist" attitude, you will attract the people around you who value the same ideals.

    Let them boys be boys, they will grow up in their own time, as everyone is like a flower, let it open on its own and it becomes one of the most beautiful things, force it open, and it becomes just a mess.

    1 person found this helpful
  12. TheRealMel
    TheRealMel avatar
    3 posts
    21 November 2018

    Hey Ashley,

    Hope your doing ok, school can be tough as you’re in with a mix of people that are all different and maybe just because of where you live and at the same age.

    Hey you know it’s also ok to choose not to talk to school friends about how you feel, and can be helpful to talk to someone outside like the places Geoff mentioned.

    The plus side of that is you can be really open and it stays private while you get the bonus of meeting more people that share similar views!

    Plus the people on this site seem really helpful, positive and kind so hang out here from time to time too.

    Wishing you the best, follow your own dreams and peaceful path, be kind to yourself, the world is yours :)

    TheRealMel

    3 people found this helpful
  13. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    21 November 2018 in reply to TheRealMel
    Thank you 😀
  14. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    23 November 2018
    I still feel like I had some bad days this week because of behaviour in my class but it did get a little better.I hope that everyone acts good on Monday otherwise I won’t be happy with the boys again
  15. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    24 November 2018
    I still feel worried it doesn’t feel good.I don’t want to feel like I will faint/vomit anymore.I want help
  16. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    24 November 2018 in reply to TheRealMel

    I feel being worried does affect me I wish it didn’t because I try to calm myself down but it doesn’t work and it keeps on following me.What could help me ?

  17. TheRealMel
    TheRealMel avatar
    3 posts
    27 November 2018 in reply to Ashely

    Hi Ashley,

    So sorry I didn’t check back sooner. Hope you’re relaxing this evening.

    Ok I’m no expert but I worry a lot too, not the same as you, and I guarantee you’re not the same as me but what I did only last week was talk really honestly with the dr about everything and they helped me find a compatible contact and I have booked into professional counselling twice a week for the next while. I’m already feeling more positive from taking a positive step for myself and from the support in this community.

    Now I don’t know if it’s the right solution for you, it felt right for me, just sharing that you’re not alone I’m worrying about things.

    If not your GP, wondering if the ideas for places to check out from Geoff earlier posts spark your interest enough to get in touch, I think it was ReachOut and Headspace?

    I’ve been told by a professional counseller when I had work worries a couple of years ago that practicing mindfulness even 10 minutes a day can help, and it did, a Nurse on this site suggested an app SmilingMind which I have used. But I was also going to counselling about the worries, and with mindfulness, plus walking, and a good nights sleep really helped the phase pass for me.

    And so I’m off to take my own advice and get ready for zzzzzzz.

    Take care and good night Ashley.

    Mel

  18. TheRealMel
    TheRealMel avatar
    3 posts
    27 November 2018 in reply to TheRealMel
    P.S. The MoodGym App was also suggested to me by a member of this site :)
  19. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    1 December 2018 in reply to TheRealMel

    I checked Headspace and reach out.I’ve tried smiling minds it helped calm me for a few days,but now all the feelings have came back plus now I feel stressed about something in school.

    I do know I’m not alone but I don’t think I can tell anyone how I’m feeling anymore the best I can do is write my feelings down onto a piece of paper.

    Ashely

  20. Ashely
    Ashely avatar
    29 posts
    1 December 2018 in reply to TheRealMel
    I’m starting to feel sick of feeling nervous it really is annoying I wish it could go away.
    1 person found this helpful