Welcome to the bb forum. I know how hard it is to write your first post and I commend you on your courage and thank you for trusting us with your story.
Your post made perfect sense, you are definitely not clueless. But you are sad and I can understand why.
Please know that you are not alone. All families are different and experience a range of lifestyles and problems.
My father was an alcoholic and I often felt ashamed growing up. I never wanted to bring my friends around because I didn't want anyone to find out.
What I have learned as an adult is that, I am not my father. He made his choices and I make mine. He wasn't perfect but I loved him because despite his failings he had a good heart. Your mother's collection of cats may be odd but I think underlying the behaviour is either illness or pain.
I recently read a really good book and it's a movie too, called The Glass Castle. It's a true story about a family's struggles with poverty and mental illness (the parents). I recommend it because it highlights the challenges of some family life and the powet of the human spirit. The children in the story survived the trauma and went on to live their best lives.
And that's what I want for you. There is always hope for better days ahead.
I'm wondering if you might want to share how old you are? I'm asking because if you have a teacher you are close to, it might pay to have a chat about what you are experiencing. Talking to your doctor is also a really good idea, given how depressed you feel.
You may not be able to change your family or household situation but you can improve how you feel and how you respond to events in your household.
It can get better. Kind thoughts to you