Thanks for replying!
Reading your response actually helped me put a couple things into perspective. When I wrote this post I was having a particularly difficult day and although I stand by a couple things I said that day, I was also being a bit melodramatic, hahaha.
My intentions to do an arts degree was because of two things really- I'm interested in humanities subjects and an Arts degree offers a lot of flexibility for someone, like me, who doesn't exactly know what they want to do. In regards to the future I envision for myself...I'm not entirely sure, I'm just going with the flow, so to say. One thing I know for sure is that I'd love to travel.. This has been the only consistent dream of mine since like year 8. I've always planned to take a gap year before going to uni. For a while, I wanted to be a journalist but I've changed my mind :/
After having a little chat with my mum, I'm most likely going to stick with VCE. I have the option of doing unscored VCE too, which means I wouldn't get an ATAR or do end of year exams, but i probably won't do that unless I was absolutely sure I don't want to go to uni or as a last resort I guess if it gets too tough. Honestly,the thing I'm dreading the most about yr12 is that during the winter months, I have a habit to break down and my studying habits, my routine, attendance all goes to crap. So far this year I don't think it's stuffed me up too much but I'm nervous because it could really muck me up in year 12. If mucking up during winter next year is just the difference between me getting a 80 atar or a 60 atar, considering i might not even go to uni... maybe it won't be a big deal. That's not to say i'll just let my anxiety mess with my school life, but just that I'll just focus on getting through it rather than obsessing over what it might do to my scores.
Anyway, I'm starting VCE Unit 2 now so I still have time to decide things. Uni isn't completely off the cards but I'd like to have some backup options because based on my current feelings, I don't think uni is for me. Right now I'm just going to focus on doing the best I can in year 11. Year 12 is still a few months away!
Thanks again for replying, you've definitely helped clear my mind a little bit!