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Topic: 16 years old I'm not really sure what to do

10 posts, 0 answered
  1. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    21 April 2019
    So im 16 years old and idk how to explain whats going on but I just feel really off and idk what it is like the past couple of years I've felt like abit off and not feeling fully here and spaced out, and id always think its this thing called 'depersonolization' and i'd kind of just shrug it off. But at the end of 2017 i'd start having heaps of panick attacks and was just crying and feeling like shit all day and night i cant really remember what happened it was a while ago, but i remember just feeling like i cant think straight i cant remember things and i just didnt feel like 'me' idk how to explain it, and then i searched it up and it came up with depersonalization so then i joined a forum and read all the things that people said and i could kind of relate to it and yeh id just be on there and look up videos about depersonalization and all that stuff and think all along that i had it, but then as time went on it literally took like till about a couple of months ago i looked more into the symptoms of depersonalization and it said like it feels like ''you're in a dream and life doesnt feel real'', i mean ive kind of had those feelings but they went away after a few seconds but i dont have that? so now im confused as to whether or not i even have it after all this time thinking i had it, and now im just going through life every day just thinking about it wondering if i even have it or not, its pretty messed up tbh all that time and energy i spent into thinking i had it i maybe dont and im just lost as hell, but i genuinely cry alot thinking and wondering if i even have it because its really scaring me like what the hells wrong with me I'm not really sure what to do right now, i feel neutral but idk its just something in the back of my mind it just doesnt feel right and i dont feel right, as im typing this i just feel pretty strange reflecting on it all. I'm just not sure, and i needed to get this out on a new forum and i feel better explaining it, it took me a couple of days to actually sign up on here because at first i wasnt sure if i should bother doing it because in past experiences i'd post on a forum and nobody would reply but then i thought its worth a shot maybe see if anyone can relate and possibly tell me whats going on because im stumped idk what to do.
  2. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    22 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden
    Anyone?
  3. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Croix avatar
    234 posts
    22 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden

    Dear ShootaSugden~

    I'd like to welcome you here. It is a friendly and caring place, however it can sometimes be slow, and I guess you have been disappointed that you have not been answered before now. I'd stress it is nothing to do with you at all, or what you are posting about, it is the system itself.

    OK, having said that I've read though your post. It's a good one, it explains how you feel very clearly. And by the sound of it life has given you a hard -and worrying -time. The things you say, feeling removed, panic attacks, crying, feeling like shit and all the rest need to be fixed.

    Life can be so much clearer and enjoyable.

    Can I suggest you seem to be going about things the hard way? You have not mentioned doctors or psychs or even councilors, but have gone to forums and Dr Google. It's easy to understand why, forums may have people your own age and the internet is easy to search, however getting a processional diagnosis is sensible.

    Once the problem has been identified then the right actions can be taken. 2 years or so of not feeling like yourself is enough.

    So can I suggest you talk this over with someone you trust and get them to take you to the doctor for a long consultation so you can explain taking your time -or even show the post you have made. Then take it from there.

    If you have seen a doctor it does not sound as if the treatment is working, and you need to go back and say so.

    Now this might seem rather a disappointing first reply, however I've suffered some of the things you were talking about, though I was older, and only started to improve with medical help, now I'm good.

    You have quite a choice of people to talk to, a parent of course if you get on well, a school councilor, or you can contact direct, either the Kids Help Line (1800 55 1800) or Headspace (you can find the closes Headspace center at https://headspace.org.au/headspace-centres/)

    The idea using any of these is to see a qualified medical person and get a diagnosis.

    The chances are gong to be you will find it is something that responds well to treatment. Treatment may be very simple, and in any case is not scary, not like the scariness of wondering what is wrong.

    I would like you to talk some more here, I'm afraid you do need to have patience, but we will get back to you if you post.

    Croix

  4. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    22 April 2019 in reply to Croix
    Thanks so much for posting back i appreciate it, so basically idk im young and whenever i tell my mum slightly what im going through not in detail she basically says she cant help me and if you want any of your issues resolved take medication and leaves it at that. Now i've researched so much about mental health and the majority of people say that taking some sort of medication has left them feeling zombie like/not well and really bad side effects so I'm kinda iffy & hesitant to try that stuff. I know it 'could' possibly help me but im just not sure. All in all im just not sure how i feel, and i thought i was feeling a certain way but now im not sure im pretty lost, its kind of like a calm lost tho like im not panicking about it. So yeah im not sure, but i do feel better actually talking to someone about it because I just cant bring myself to tell the full story to my mum my dad or my friends, because it just feels like im being dramatic or i just cant explain myself properly so it leads them to the wrong idea or yeah idk i feel uncomfortable opening up, because they just view me as chill and they dont suspect anythings ever wrong.
  5. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Croix avatar
    234 posts
    22 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden

    Dear ShootaSugden~

    Well, I can understand, you want that idea you are A-OK to keep on going, you will not be surprised to know I tried that -for a long time. And for a short time it worked -no inconvenient questions, no hassles, nobody thinking you were making a fuss, attention seeking or just being young.

    I call it a mask, in the long run it made me further away from everyone, isolated. Also I got the idea if I had to hide the real me then that real me was not valuable, not likable either -s**t.

    Sorry for the bad language, but it fits.

    You are a little bit right about medications. Everyone is different, and provided you get a doctor who has patience and is prepared to listen there are an awful lot of alternatives. I went though a heap, it was a right pain as I'd have to tail off one before trying another. But I got there.

    Who's to say you will not get the right one quickly.

    Mine work -well mostly, no dopiness, in fact no side effects worth mentioning. I've been on them for years and my life is pretty good. The old me is mostly gone.

    You notice I'm saying it as accurately as I can, no 100% promises, just pretty good. I did have other problems which I can't imagine you do, so maybe for you it might be even better -dunno.

    For some people a med is temporary, and they go off, others like me stay on them permanently, like insulin for a diabetic - it is needed. How you would go is anyone's guess, but if you don't try I can't see you improving any more than I didn't.

    If you think those that know you aren't going to take you seriously then try the two I gave you, Kids Help Line to talk straight away, and Headspace for longer term help.

    Meds can be part of it, so can therapy, so can you.

    Croix

  6. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    23 April 2019 in reply to Croix
    Ok thanks so much, I'll really consider the things you said, feeling really relieved to just chat to atleast SOMEONE who will give me answers and help because i try kind of telling people about it and they just think hmmm, sounds like a you problem. Do you know why some people struggle tremendously with mental health issues where as others are just like meh whatever. i dont get it i really dont :/
  7. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    23 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden
    like ive had no traumas i live in a beautiful part of Australia my house is peaceful where i live theres no violence or anything everyone nice, i dont get it
  8. ShootaSugden
    ShootaSugden avatar
    6 posts
    23 April 2019 in reply to Croix
    btw all i really want to figure out is if i have depersonalization or not because im just not sure and my mind feels tripped out because all this time i thought i had it but now im not sure, and i feel like im in a glitch or something its weird.
  9. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Croix avatar
    234 posts
    23 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden

    Dear ShootaSugden~

    I think you are getting hung up on a label - depersonalization. Actually it doe not really matter what you call it. Look at the things you are feeling - despite living in a good environment in a peaceful household with nice people - and no trauma:

    feeling a bit off
    not fully feeling here
    spaced out
    panic attacks
    just crying
    feeling like shit all day and night
    can't think straight
    can't remember things
    being afraid of what might be wrong

    Even if you do not have all of these all the time, the overall effect cannot make life enjoyable, in fact it is horrible. And you deserve better - much better.

    This is why I go on about support, and if those around you dismiss it as a 'you' problem then reach out further.

    You're going to get sick of me saying this😒

    Croix

  10. Poppy101
    Poppy101 avatar
    1 posts
    23 April 2019 in reply to ShootaSugden

    Hi,

    You mentioned that you are 16, are you still attending high school? If so, I'm pretty sure every high school has a free school counselor who you can go and see whenever suits you during school hours or even after. Everything is kept confidential and your friends and not even your parents have to know.

    This could be a good way to speak to a professional without pressure or any cost involved and to help you unpack the issues that you are having.

    Hope this helps.
    Poppy