ever since I was 10 I was kicked out of home caused by mt mum and dad splitting up and then my mum got a new boyfriend who phycially and emotinally abused me and then I decided that I didn’t want to deal with everything and I tried to take my life but I stopped because I thought about all of my friends who would be sad and distrot about it so I stopped and was put into hospital due to self harm.
I then decided to move out of home and I lived on the streets for about a year I then found a youth refuge and I hated it I got bullied and bashed multiple times by the girls and boys in there which again forced me to self harm to try to get away from it all but just when I thought it was finally over the refuge workers walked in due to the music being to loud then rang the police and the ambulance I thought that finally I would be able to get away from it all. I was wrong.
I then moved into a friends house where I started doing drugs and selling myself for money because I was in need of money after that I got in contact with a lady who helped me find another refuge and it didn’t help at all!
I can’t talk to councellors because I don’t feel like I can trust them but when I got forced to I found out that they are nice people and that they can help I have stopped seeing them now and I feel worse than what I ever was I have started back on drugs and self harming because of bullying.
I have recently stopped self harming due to being put in a foster home and I love it but the thought is still in the back of my head and it hasn’t left ever since I was 10.
I don’t want this to go on anymore I want to stay somewhere more then a few weeks I’m always feeling sad and nothing seems to cheer me up.
I also want everyone to put together and at least try to stop the bullying it is a way that kids our age take there anger out and then once they find out that they have killed themselfs they still don’t care I’m over being bullied and abused I have tried to kill myself so many times and all of the times it has not worked :/
bailee
August 14, 2012
Hi there Bailee,
Thank you so much for sharing your story with us. The courage you have shown over your journey is inspirational and will touch many others on this site. We are glad you have a safe place to stay now and admire your commitment to getting better. This is a great first step. You shouldnt have to do this alone though. Please talk to your foster family about finding a local counsellor to help guide you. You can do this by making an appointment with a GP for a mental health assessment. They can refer you on to a therapist and help organise paperwork for medicare assistance. You could also give the Beyondblue info line a call on 1300 22 4636.
Keep talking Bailee and let us know how you go,
Youth Beyondblue Team